I know I bang on a lot about positive thinking and not bowing down to the exhausting demands of beauty advertising etc, but right now I am having a crisis of confidence all round.
Call it summer in general and my inability to be able to find the kick ass Summer wardrobe of my dreams, call it the first year ever that I seem to be suffering from allergies (or as us English people call it, ‘hay fever’); I don’t know. All I do know is I am not feeling it and something must be done.
It’s #avoluptuouslove emergency!
It could be all this beach body nonsense and all the blatant fat shaming (of selves and others) that flows across the internet. I spend a large part of my life beating myself up about being the size I am but things are changing for me and I hope a lot of women who don’t fit the industry ‘ideal’. This is because there are more and more visible, fucking fabulous plus-size bloggers out there*, with attitudes that just make sense.
We’re not lesser individuals, we’re not unattractive – there is a place for every single one of us, no matter what size, colour or level of beauty. We have the right to exist alongside our slimmer friends.
Plus, have you seen the array of fashion available to us fatties? ASOS Curve, New Look, Missguided, Boohoo; these are my lifelines, my Wonderland. I’ll do some fashion wish lists from all of those sites shortly, although New Look: it’s not cool that you’ve closed down most of the in-store plus-size sections, you know that, right?
So I am working on myself, on finding my personal ‘happy’. It definitely isn’t about being thin, since I haven’t been that since I was twelve. I love my body for the most part, it’s strong and delicious – but I know I need to swap the sofa and Netflix for a walk every now and again. And it’s not just about fat, it’s about healthy skin, accepting that I’m not 21, making friends with my 37 year old face.
This might sound like a whingey post, and for that I am sorry. I’m cool with who I am. I just want to feel better; and so I’m going to work on that this Summer. It will be a more fulfilling project than finding the perfect flat sandals, probably.
Incidentally, is this the Great British Summer now? (One day of sun and counting)
*Browse my Reading List above for some great plus-size bloggers (and more!)